Monday, January 30, 2017

Tokusatsu Review: Shruiken Sentai Ninninger vs Toqger Part 3: Just end already!

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Oh good they're all lined up in a row. TIME FOR TARGET PRACTICE!!!
Ok, ok I think I've recovered from the last time I tried to sit through this, THING! So before we wrap this turkey up I need to make a correction. Back in the first part of this review I made the error of perpetuating the lie that Carranger saved Sentai after the unfortunate events surrounding Ohranger. Mostly in my phrasing of it, I meant to say that the direction of Carranger was needed during the time of Ohranger as well as speculating why Toei keeps creating poorly written gimmick series after the previous series failed to meet expectations. This is due to while Toy Sales for Ohranger were the highest the franchise ever saw at the time the writing was being helmed by Hirohisa Soda who was brought back after Toei gave Noboru Sugimura and Toshiki Inoue the boot after the subway gas attacks to try to get away from the serious war plot that the show was originally building towards. However Soda by this point had long since gone flat and after the last series he helmed Fiveman actually nearly killed Sentai, he retired. But since Toei dragged him and two other writers out to cobble together this frankensteins monster of a show he just reused the older goofy scripts that he used during his time, didn't bother to update and just seemed to not give the slightest amount of a shit.

 So a serious series being derailed by a writer past his prime who just didn't seem to care and didn't even want to be there in the first place, coupled with plenty of pointless behind the scenes drama and anyone would think that this was a recipe for disaster. But this is just me paraphrasing here; this guy actually did his homework and stated his sources so check his video to put an end to that "Carranger saved Sentai" rumor once and for all. But the main point of my argument still stands, after Carranger started to get Sentai back on its feet viewership-wise Toei came to the conclusion that poorly written comedy series are the solution to a series failing. (Forgetting the fact that Carrangers viewership improved after the "Parody" elements of the show were dropped around the introduction of VRV Master (Aka the Phantom Ranger for those in the states)) So thus it's because of this misconstrued case that we got poorly written piles of pigshit like Ninninger and Toqger stinking up the airwaves with it's unlikable characters, bad writing and resolutions that just make you sick when you stop and think about it for even a second.

 Speaking of there's only 20 minutes left of this movie left so lets just get this over with. We left off with Leftovers being brought back to life literally due to wishful thinking (I refuse to use the "I" word in this instance under protest for we are better as a species.) Akira meets back up with the others unintentionally as Mavro kicked him toward the group like a football.
Oh I'm right there with you asshole. And if you learned how he survived you would eat your own head out of sheer Lovecraftian madness.
 Needless to say Mavro's peeved and summons his army to fight. The two groups of rangers transform and begin the big final brawl that's traditional by this point in these movies. The two groups fight against the forces of Mavro, Mavro's guys get beat, he gets a special mech, quotes Dio Brando, the tumor in my head grows slightly and the two teams combine their attacks which kills Mavro. The Toqgers and Ninningers say their goodbyes, Sora and Riku make it back to the Destiny Islands, Doc and his family fly away in their new time train, Ezio dies on the park bench in Florence, Simon tells the kid that the lights in the sky are stars, we zoom in on Kyubey's eye to see a window tied together with pink string, Waspinator is left on Earth but is worshiped by the Neanderthals, Sally sings La vie en Rose to Elizabeth, Al leaves the room having been rejected by the editor. Oh wait I'm sorry folks I'm just remembering endings that were far better and had more of an emotional impact then this one.

 So that was Ninninger vs Toqger it was the worst of both teams slapped right in your face with lazy costumes, a villain you couldn't take seriously and the only saving grace was this being the early bird cameo for the Zyuoghers. Actually now that I think about it this also means that we'll never have to deal with Wrong and his band of nitwits ever again. What's this sensation on my face? Is it a smile? I think it is folks I honestly think it is. I mean it; Toqger isn't getting adapted, though Ninninger is sad to say. Well, let's just see what they can work with out of this loud, obnoxious turd.


 I think they've got something folks. So next time both Parts of Power Rangers Ninja Steel's opening will be over so I'll give them both the once over and give my first impressions about Ninja Steel. Though I can say this right now, Brody is 1000 times more interesting and has far more potential then Leftovers.

Super Sentai is owned by Ishinomori Productions, Toei Productions, and Bandai.