Thursday, November 12, 2015

Movie Review: Back to the Future 3 Part 1: NO YOU Think 4th Dimensionally!

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Yep buckaroos its time to wrap this trilogy up with Back to the Future 3. Now before I start I just want to address a mistake I made in the review of Back to the Future 2. The guy that played the chicken noises on his chest when Marty was in 2015 wasn't played by Billy Zane. I thought that since he was in the movie he would still be playing the same type of character but it turns out I should have checked the credits to see he was playing one of the goons in the alternate 1985. I goofed.


Now on to the business at hand. At the end of BTTF 2 Marty was stranded in 1955 due to lightning hitting the DeLorean so he decided to track down 1955 Doc to get help. So we cut to the 1955 Doc helping the first Marty get back to 1985 when our Marty shows up after the first Marty went back and tells Doc that he's back which causes Doc to pass out. Anybody else as confused as I am after that sentence? Good it's not just me and usually I can keep up with convoluted BS I mean I understand the storyline of Kingdom Hearts for christ's sake and I'm still struggling.

 After the opening credits we see Marty's taken Doc back to his home. After being woken by Howdy Doody Doc starts to record an audio log thinking the alternate Marty a dream and him waking up in his home was just temporary amnesia. Marty says otherwise causing Doc to freak out and after Marty explains what happened in an even shorter amount of time then I did he shows Doc the Letter that his future self sent Marty.

Dear Marty,
If my calculations are correct, you will receive this letter immediately after you saw the DeLorean struck by lightning. First, let me assure you that I am alive and well. I've been living happily these past eight months in the year 1885. The lightning bolt that hit the DeLorean caused a gigawatt overload which scrambled the time circuits, activated the flux capacitor, and sent me back to 1885. The overload shorted out the time circuits and destroyed the flying circuits. Unfortunately, the car will never fly again.
I set myself up as a blacksmith as a front while I attempted to repair the damage to the time circuits. Unfortunately, this proved impossible because suitable replacement parts will not be invented until 1947. However, I've gotten quite adept at shoeing horses and fixing wagons.
I have buried the DeLorean in the abandoned Delgado Mine, adjacent to the Old Boot Hill Cemetery, as shown on the enclosed map. Hopefully, it should remain undisturbed and preserved until you uncover it in 1955. Inside, you will find repair instructions. My 1955 counterpart should have no problem repairing it so that you can drive it back to the future. Once you have returned to 1985, destroy the time machine.
Do not — I repeat — do not attempt to come back here to get me. I am perfectly happy living in the fresh air and wide-open spaces, and I fear that unnecessary time travel only risks further disruption of the space-time continuum. And please take care of Einstein for me. I know that you will give him a good home. Remember to walk him twice a day, and that he only likes canned dog food. These are my wishes; please respect them and follow them.
And so Marty, I now say farewell and wish you Godspeed. You've been a good, kind, and loyal friend to me, and you've made a real difference in my life. I will always treasure our relationship and think on you with fond memories, warm feelings, and a special place in my heart.
Your friend in time,
"Doc" Emmett L. Brown.
September 1, 1885.
  Marty apologizes for the whole thing and letting Biff get to him, though Doc points out that there's worse places to end up then the old west. Though I beg to differ, in fact let's see how he is right now.
Yeah Marty and Doc might just want to make a pitstop before going back. The two blow up the sealed off mine and on the way down Doc recounts how reading the works of Jules Verne was what inspired him to take up the path of Science. The two find the Time Machine (amazingly still intact and not rusted away to a pile of scrap despite being in a dank cave for 70 years 2 months and 13 days) and the instructions to repair it. The two get a tow truck to get the Time Machine out as Doc gushes over his eventual retirement in the Old West when his dog Copernicus notices something.

 Marty sees it and screams out for Doc, they found Doc's Tombstone where he died September 7th 1885, shot in the back by Buford Tannen over a matter of 80 dollars. Erected in eternal memory by his beloved Clara Yep looks like the Spacetime continuum is still being a vindictive dick to these two one week after writing the letter the local Tannen killed him.

 The two then head for the Library and look up info on Tannen, who apparently was given the nickname "Maddog" due to his short temper and tendency to drool. However they can't find anything past 1884 due to Tannen shooting an editor who wrote an unfavorable story on him. They do find however evidence of Marty's family but no Browns. Doc says that historically his family wouldn't arrive in Hill Valley until 1908 when they were known as the Von Brauns. They find a picture of Future Doc on September 5th proving everything that's going to happen, so Marty decides to back to save him.

 The next day the Time Circuits are fixed and Marty's disguised as a circus clown to go back and save Doc.
Wait that's supposed to be his old west outfit?
You know it's  pretty damn sad when this guy looks like he could fit in 1885 better then Marty. 

Doc reassures him that this is what everybody wears in westerns. Not sure what western he's seen well no choice but to take his word I guess. So the Time Machine is all gassed up, Marty's future clothes are packed, fresh batteries for the walkie talkie and the Hoverboard is packed along too. Doc tells him that their location is wide open unsettled terrain and that there's a cave nearby that should be perfect for storing the Time Machine, all Marty has to do is get to 88mph and the rest is up to him. Marty is concerned about hitting the indians on the wall but Doc just tells him to think 4th dimensionally as soon as he hits 88mph he'll be back in time and the indians won't even be there. So Marty hits 88mph and avoids crashing into the indians on the wall, only to nearly crash into real ones! Ah the Time Space continuum is so wacky.

 Marty just barely manages to avoid them and makes his way to the cave, however he discovers two problems, one an arrow managed to pierce the fuel line and two the cave has a big Bear in it! He manages to get away but lost his boots in the process as well as falling down a slope and hitting his head on a fence near the McFly farm where his ancestor Seamus McFly takes him in to recuperate. That night he wakes up being tended to by his ancestor Maggie McFly where he introduces himself as Clint Eastwood. She then goes to take care of her baby boy, Marty's great grandfather William. Seamus shows up with dinner and asks how Marty ended up there and after Marty gives as much as he can and Seamus allows him to stay the night in the barn and will take him to the railroad tracks that lead into town as well as give him a hat.

 The next day Marty arrives at Hill Valley and once again explores the town, bewildered at the unfamiliarity of the setting. He makes his way to the saloon and asks for where Doc is when a certain thug comes a knock'n. Maddog Tannen and his gang who are also looking for Doc. After some shenanigans involving Michael Jackson and a spittoon Marty is nearly hung by Maddog at the construction site of the Courthouse where Doc saves him by shooting the rope hanging him with a super precise custom sniper-rifle. Tannen says Doc owes him 75 dollars for improperly shoeing his horse and 5 dollars for a destroyed bottle of Kentucky redeye whiskey.

 Doc says thats his problem since Tannen never paid him for the job anyway. Tannen however tells Doc to watch himself because one day he's going to get a bullet in his back. Afterwords Doc takes Marty back to his workshop where we'll pick up next time.

Back to the Future is owned by Robbert Zebecks, Bob Gale, Stephen Spielberg, Amblin Entertainment  and Universal Studios.
One Million Ways to Die in the West is owned by Seth McFarland, Fuzzy DoorProductions, Media Rights Capital, Bluegrass Films and Universal Pictures.
Ultima IX: Ascension is owned by Electronic Arts, Origin Systems, and Richard Garriot AKA Lord British.
Super Sentai is owned by Ishinomori Productions, Toei Productions, and Bandai.